Funny

Newton ne apple niche girte dekha aur Gravity ki khoj ki.
usko ye pucho ki 25 saal se sandas karta tha, wo kya upar jata tha? sala chutiya bana gaya sabko.

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Porpose karne ka naya style..!
Chand ko tor dunga, Suraj ko phor dunga, Tu ek bar haan karde buss..
Pahli wali ko chor dunga!

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Sardar Ne Biwi Se Poocha : Aaj To Chicken Bahut Tasty Hai, kuch Khas Masala Lagaya Hai Kya?
Biwi : Kuch Nahi Thodi Si Jal Gayi Thi... Isliye Barnol Cream Lagaya.

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Kabhi yaad aaye to phone kar Lena, Paise kam ho to sms kar Lena, Agar ye bhi na kar sake to Mobile dahi me daal kar vibration on karna, Or LASSI pi Lena..

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Sardar wife se : shanti ko bulao
Wife : Kaun apni kamwali?
Sardar : Haa
Wife : Kyun?
Sardar : Doctor ne bola hai ki goli khao aur shanti k saath so jao. - Rakesh

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a boy went 2 meet his LOVE, when he returned home his mom asked "kaha gaye the?"
boy- "girl friend se milne"
mom- "kisliye?"
boy- "haan bahot kiss liye"

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Ek chaay wala ek ladki ko dekh kar gana gata hai:- "bholi si surat aankhon me masti dur khadi muskaye aay haaye…… Ladki kahti hai:- "kali si surat hath me ketli thele me khada chillaye... chaay chaay.

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Ek Ganje k sir par do Baal the, dono ko aapas mein Pyar ho gaya, Shadi bhi karna chahte the magar kar na sake..Batao kyu?????
kyon ki Baal Vivah apradh hai...!

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Teacher- 'aisa kaun sa kaam hai jo 5 ladke ek sath kar sakte hai, par 5 ladkiya kabhi nahi kar sakti?'
student- 'sir ek hi Balti me susu'

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1 Good reason Why India can never win against australia? Its all in the name: The last 3 alphabets of australia says ‘lia’ And India says ‘dia’

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petrol ke daam badne par santa ne kaha - mainu koi pharak nahi padta, pehle bhi 100 ka bharwata tha , ab bhi 100 ka bharwata hoon. - Sunil Singh

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santa k ghar ek din sasural wale aye
biwi ne santa ko kaha ki jao aur mahemano k liye kuch lekar aao.
santa bahar gaya aur taxi le kar aa gaya.

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Pappu- wo ladki behri hai.
Raju- Kaise?
Pappu- Maine use I LOVE U kaha to boli
"Maine kal hi naya sandal kharida he."

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Santa was seated In A cricket ground.. Security:Cricket match is over now,why r u stil sitting?
santa:oye yaar, i m waiting for highlights

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Sharabi ne Doctor se pucha: Aap meri Sharaab chudva sakte ho? Doctor:Haan kyoun nahi. Sharabi: To Police ne meri 20 bottle pakdi hai, Plz chudva do...!!!!!!

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Ek ladka gadhe k samne gir gaya,
Ek khubsurt ladki ne dekha or kaha - "apne bade bhaiya k pair chhu rahe ho Very good boy"
Ladka- ha bhabhi ji! Santa:Sharab pite pite rone laga Banta:Kya hua,ro kyu rohe ho Santa:Yar jis ladki ko bhulaneke liye pe raha tha uska naam yad nhi araha he

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Santa:bus stand tak jane k kitnay paise
Taximan:40rs
Snta:2rs me chalega?
taximan:2rs me kaun jayega?
Snta:piche baith me leke jata hu..

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interviewer: where r u born,
Sardar: punjab
Interviewer : which part?
Sardar: kya which part whole body was born in punjab.

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Santa: Yaar, kal main bathroom gaya to waha Lion tha
Banta: Phir kya Hua?
Santa: Kuch nhi, main kha,tum kar lo
Meri to waise hi Nikal gayi

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Santa comes to school with 1 black and 1 white shoe. Teacher - Go home and change.
Santa- sir, ghar me bhi ek black aur white hi hai.!

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What's the difference between Bus & Cycle??
Santa:- Bus ka stand bus ke sath kabhi nahi jaata Par Cycle ka stand humesha Cycle ke sath jata hai.

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a man asked sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes walking at evening not in the morning.
Sardarji replied "Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM

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Santa : "Ek Kilo Gaay Ka Dhoodh Dena."
Banta : "Lekin Tumhara Bartan To Bahut Chhota Hai."
Santa :"Theek He To Fir BAKRI Ka De de."